Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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