honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
