I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Randomize
