you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize