3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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