Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
