I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
