PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
