so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
