I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
