i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
