He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
