We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize