Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
