Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
