Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
