I'm laying in your front yard are you home
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I wish i was in the wii world.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
The Olympian is in my bed
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
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