so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Randomize