I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
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