No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize