Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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