We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
soo... how was my night?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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