Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Randomize
