tell your sister to shave her snatch
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
