the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Couch. On fire.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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