That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
that may or may not have been my penis.
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