I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Randomize
