STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize