You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
