Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
