I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
