nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
