I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
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