i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
