Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
