So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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