HIV tests are more positive than that guy
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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