Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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