he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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