We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
