I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
