Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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