Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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