I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
