My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Randomize
