literally had 100 drinks last night.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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