I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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