Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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