her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
