are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
organizing the empties. That sober.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Randomize
