He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Pappa wants mamma naked
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
She told me I should be a condom model.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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